Rachel Talley, Author at Living Mom Birth

Orgasmic vs. Induced...You Choose!

Here is a trailer of a new website have been scouring over for the past several months. ORGASMIC BIRTH. What a GREAT name! The video is finally out which I am excited about receiving soon. It is all so FASCINATING to me! There is an EXCELLENT video found on the site that I tried to download here but couldn't figure out. It's called Birth By The Numbers. WATCH IT! It's chalk full of VERY IMPORTANT information of why we are where we are at with the C-section rate and such. Can I say I LOVE videos? What a BENEFICIAL and QUICK way to educate the masses!

My good friend Bonnie just emailed me a GREAT article in regards to pitocin and induction of labor. Thank you, my friend for sending it my way! Here's a little blurb from it!

"According to Nancy Griffin and Mothering magazine [2], the medical inducement of labor is medically required in only about 3 percent of pregnancies, but 81 percent of women in US hospitals receive Pitocin either to induce or augment their labors. “The majority [of induced labors] aren’t medically necessary,” and “that therefore approximately 75 percent of all inductions put both the mother and baby at risk."

According to Roberto Caldreyo-Barcia, MD, former president of the International Federation of Obstetricians and Gynecologists and an eminent researcher into the effects of obstetrical interventions, Pitocin is the most abused drug in the world today."

“The World Health Organization deplores routinely using Pitocin. The Physician’s Desk Reference says that Pitocin should be used only when medically necessary.”

“Pitocin can cause increased pain, fetal distress, neonatal jaundice, and retained placenta; and recent research suggests that exposure to Pitocin may be a factor in causing autism.”

Eric Hollander of Mount Sinai Medical Center in New York, for example, links autistic children with Pitocin-induced labors.

“In 1978, the FDA advisory committee removed its approval of Pitocin for the elective induction of labor. (The drug has never been approved by the FDA for the use of augmenting labor.) The current Physician’s Desk Reference clearly states that ‘Pitocin is not indicated for elective induction of labor’.” [2]

“Augmenting labor, often confused with induction, is a slightly different process, used to help or speed up a labor that began on its own.” “A basic fear of the natural process of childbirth has led, over many centuries, to a cultural warping of childbirth. Justifiable fear about the possible death of a baby or mother in childbirth, combined with beliefs in magic, rituals, drugs, herbal remedies, and much later, technology [technology being viewed on the same level as blood letting], has led to the use of a whole host of ‘cures’ for labors that didn’t seem to start ‘on time’.” [2]

The article is actually called "Don't Push The Baby." Please click on the link and read the whole thing. It is DEFINITELY an intriguing read. For some of you, this article might be a bit out there since it is ultimately discussing the metaphysical implications of forcing a baby to come before his/her set forth time. Which, by the way, I absolutely agree need to come into play when we are discussing effects of any choice we make in regards to birth. The person writing the article is VERY passionate. If you feel it to be a bit harsh, then please just take from the article what sings to you! I did, for sure!

When we choose to disregard the emotional/pyschological and spiritual aspects of a choice and believe that only the physical matters, we then create a destined outcome that might make things worse instead of better. As you already know, my belief is that the majority of physical issues are only manifested because of storage overload from an emotional/spiritual space. I was just talking with Elena from Birth As We Know It last week and we were both shaking our heads in disbelief of how the emotional/physcological aspects of birth are not being dealt with or even discussed ANYWHERE. I choose to believe that all realms of ourselves....physical, emotional, and spiritual work in harmony in striving to create the healthiest US! That only tells me that each plays an important role in my overall well being. To think that one is more important than the other only creates improper imbalances and with that can come all kinds of future crises or calamities.

At this point, I am planning on attending Elena's apprenticeship workshop next month. I am VERY excited. I am going with a friend, her daughter and my sister in law Yulia, who is working with me at births right now. The rule is NO BABIES at the workshop....but my dear friend, Charlene, has offered her services to me and will be watching Mabel for 10 days, bringing her back and forth so I can still attend somewhat to Mabel with feedings and such. THANK YOU, CHARLENE! You are my angel! I had not planned fully on going. Merely because of several restraints. First being cost. Next, the Mabel issue. Then finding a place to stay in Chico, Ca. Within one week of fervent prayer, the stars aligned and it seems that everything has come perfectly into place for us to be able to attend. My jaw is still dropping, to be honest. I am in SHOCK!! I honestly thought I wasn't going to be able to go and with VERY little effort everything came together and we're going.

So...aside from the ECSTASY over going, I am sharing it here because I am asking for prayers. Part of me believes Mabel will be fine because when I was praying about going, my prayers also consisted of that if everything worked out then that meant that Mabel would be HAPPY while we were there. But another part of me is VERY attached to my sweet little one. We have worked VERY hard to create a trauma free/emotionally healing environment from conception til now for her. One where she can share with us always where she's at emotionally and we will respond and help relieve any issues. The last thing we want is for her to feel saddened or abandoned in anyway because of this trip. All of your prayers have helped me/us so much in the past, I know they will again this time. I will go ahead and say how much I truly have and am appreciating it!! It means to much to me and I have noticed so much love from each of you when I make these requests. Thank you!

Oh, by the way, we had a VERY Merry Christmas! I was going to post about our Christmas first but I am waiting for my mother in law to upload the pictures on her computer. When that happens I will post more details. I hope everyone has a VERY JOYFUL rest of the holiday season!!

Abundant peace to all,
Rachel

by Rachel Talley

Evangelina Margarita's Birth

Another INSPIRING and BEAUTIFUL birth! Olya's special delivery was another uplifting moment in my life. Beware of tears streaming while reading this! My tears were FLOWING. Again...I LOVE that I even get the opportunity to participate in something so AMAZING! I just can't believe it.

Olya, I feel so touched by being a part of your whole experience. When you decided to enter this new path, you COMPLETELY took the bull of the horns and spend the last 5 weeks using every moment applying faith, trust, courage and strength in yourself and your Higher Powers!! WOW!

You are another woman in my life who has become more than just a friend but a dear sister! Please understand...that I am not here to teach you or help you learn ANYTHING. I believe that I am here in only the capacity of helping you to REMEMBER who you are, what you are, and why you are here! I believe that if I have even done that, it is only because it has been gifted to me by my Higher Source. Please know...that you have done the same for me! THANK YOU!

I love you, Olya! Rachel

Dec 8, 2008 at 11:49 pm we welcomed our beautiful Evangelina Margarita into this world, weighing 6lb 6 oz and 19 1/4 " tall. I had an AMAZING birth experience! I strongly believe, actually KNOW that preparation - emotional , spiritual and physical - equal in ALL areas is essential. It is essential for every aspect of life, but as we connect so close to Divine Power during birth, I believe that it is so important to be at peace and in harmony with everything. This is the way - as I see it - for our spirit to connect to God and Heavenly Mother more then ever as we are bringing one of Their sons or daughters into our world.

I am so ever grateful to Rachel, who helped me to learn so many new things. I am very grateful to Heavenly Father for leading me to her , and to everyone who was a part of the process. Thank you to all! The birth of my baby was so beautiful and so empowering, it brings tears to my eyes every time I think about it. I wish sincerely for every woman to experience the same feelings that I have inside and have the birth that is right for them.

I started having contractions on Sunday. Nothing too-too regular, and since I already had at least 2 false alarms, I didn't even pay attention. I enjoyed the church, then the sweat lodge, wonderful food and conversation and didn't think twice about anything. Over night I kept dreaming about beautiful colors - never had that before - and woke up very invigorated, happy ( although not really looking forward to a VERY long day with my son's performance), and full of love. I felt so much LOVE for my husband - it is hard to explain. Later - when I was in labor - Rachel told me to snuggle with my husband , as the same energy of love that creates the baby, brings it here too. I immediately thought about morning. THAT is why it felt so different.

As we were getting ready to leave, I kept more and more realizing that my contractions are coming all the time , and regularly. I didn't time them yet, but started to realize that something is different now. I didn't want to get too excited though - the "what if false alarm" kept me pretty grounded. Then it started snowing . I ALWAYS imagined that I'd have this baby on the FIRST day it would snow in Dec! It was so cute when my almost 5 year old son saw the snow and said " Mommy, Christmas is coming! " and when I said that the baby would need to be born first, he came to me and said : Ok! Baby, can you come now?! We want Christmas! " Made me laugh, yet think too.

So, by around 11-30 I was pretty sure something was different. I called my midwife with a question , and then decided that , yes, it would be a good idea to give heads up to others ( she works with the partner and has an apprentice). And just as that quote that I posted a few weeks ago, once we commit, the universe provides. I felt complete assurance instantly that this is it.By about 1 pm I met with my husband and he decided to time contractions. They were about 5 minutes apart. I realized that I am NOT going to my sons performance ( as I was helping backstage), Justin's sister was able to help ( THANK YOU!), and Justin and I headed home.

The contractions were strong enough for me to be constantly reminded of them and for me to stop doing things, yet I felt that there would be a little bit before it would "hit". We wanted to have a homebirth. Lot's of people think that it is not safe, complications, etc - well, on my own experience : you are FAR more in danger at the hospital, as absurd as it may sound. Do your research - there is nothing like seeing it with your own eyes.All through the labor Justin and I kept going in the awe :" This is AMAZING. SO much BETTER then the hospital! " As I had 2 hospital births, both inductions ( and at THAT time I thought that my hospital experience was not too bad. Until I started to learn to THINK for myself rather then follow what I was told ) I had a lot to compare to. Just being at home made my labor be so much easier. No monitors, no ties, no IVs, no shots - just me and my baby and my husband. Not for a second did I worry about my baby's well being. ( and i was going crazy following the monitors in the hospital ). Ability to be free to move - ahh, what a blessing! i felt the same intensity of contractions at 7-8 sm at home as I felt at 3-4 sm in the hospital. I will give credit to hypnobabies, but I didn't use them until the very end. There was just no need : being comfortable in my surroundings made a HUGE difference. Justin was all in the clouds . He would tell everyone who called him that he couldn't talk, because his wife was in labor :) : ) :) I love my husband. :)

So, we prepared everything : the bed, the towels and all the other stuff that you get in the hospital ( and that they literally charge you 1000 times MORE for, and you get it all for under $70 off the home birthing sites). I rested for a little , although by then it was rather uncomfortable. By 6: 45 I decided that I wanted Rachel here. I had 3 midwifes all to myself! :) How cool is that? You are lucky if you get 1 doctor through your labor - I don't think that ever happens though, unless the doctor is your family member.To speed up things we went for a walk - sort of. The walk consisted of bout 50 feet and then me hanging on Justin thinking "open, open , open" and "peace" - my hypnobabies stuff - and me gradually getting lower and lower to the ground. Plus, the fact that I had to pee every 15 minutes didn't help either - we mostly walked up and down the hill on the nearest street. When finally, my "stops" became more like crawls on the ground, I figured it was about time to get back. Plus, the fact that it was freezing outside made "home" sound wonderful.

I didn't plan on waterbirth at all. I thought that I'd labor in water and deliver on the bed. But I didn't really have an objection to waterbirth either. I decided to go with the flow and see what my body would want. Through the whole labor I was kind of thinking that I would not even want to labor in the tub - I felt nice and comforted by what I had around. By the time I was 7-8 sm though, the thought of warm water was very appealing. Justin filled the tub, and once I got in, I felt SO MUCH pressure to just go away. I loved the feeling. The contractions were there , but they were not nearly as intense and I felt them on the "dry" ground. With the hypnobabies affirmations cd in my ears I even wondered if it was normal to feel so good. Don't get me wrong : I FELT the contractions, but I loved feeling them. Not to sound self-distractive or anything, but I welcomed every single one of them. I don't know , whether it was the fact of hypnobabies, or emotional work, or the fact that I never had the real labor before , or it is all the factors together( which is what i believe was the truth), but I loved my contractions.

There was a moment during the transition that it really was hard, but a huge part of it ( I think) was that I didn't have the urge to push : i just consciously pushed because I knew I needed to. I still can't understand why I didn't feel like pushing. I'll figure it out before the next one :) When the head crowned though, everything else became absolutely easy : no pain, no pushing , nothing - my body just did the work. I cannot express my feelings in words - there are no words - of how wonderful and AMAZING it feels to have your baby come, to feel the little head coming into this world, and then seeing it , taking the body into your OWN arms and bringing the baby to your chest. Every woman deserves and needs to feel this. Doctors truly rob us of this joy. The LOVE and CONNECTION that appears the moment you feel your baby is something that cannot be described.

I am so ever grateful to Rachel for re-creating the power within me. I went from being freaked out to move, to having complete confidence that in case we had to deliver the baby ourselves, we would be able to do that. ( Although I DID want her to be there :) And I am happy she was ) My little girl was born at 11;49 - just 10 minutes away from the new day! Interesting enough, that a few days before I wrote in my pregnancy journal that I planned on having the baby before or on, but not later then Dec 8, 08. Sure enough! The power of believe, thought, words and prayer is amazing.

I lost a little bit of blood after the delivery - the same reason I bled at the beginning too : the way my placenta formed and attached - and that is when I learned for myself, that had I NOT followed the inner feelings and continued with my "safe and proven " hospital program, I think neither I nor my baby would be here right now. Yeva ( short for Evangelina in Ukraine, and that is what we are calling our little girl ) had a very short cord that she HAD wrapped around her neck , and that UNWRAPPED within the last couple of weeks. If I went with the doctors, i would NEVER make it to these last "couple of weeks". The fact that the cord was short was also UNKNOWN. I was told that she had a VERY LONG cord according to the U/S. With this "100% accuracy" ( as my doctor AND perinatologist assured me) I would be INDUCED, which means that somewhere during the delivery either the cord would get much too tight for the baby to be able to get enough oxygen or the placenta would tear off earlier. Results of both are terrible enough for me not to want to write them. And then the fact of induction. Pitocin makes one bleed more and contract harder. In my situation that would be a straight path for transfusion in the best case scenario.

None of this happened. THANK YOU, God and Rachel. To God - for inspiring me and showing me the right way. To Rachel - for being responsive to inspirations and acting on them. Through just 5 weeks that I had with Rachel, she taught me SO MUCH, and made me understand SO MUCH - things that may have sounded crazy to others. But the truth was that there was no time to be fulling around : I had 5 weeks to do everything that a regular person would have at least 8 months for. And it all paid off miraculously : a beautiful healthy baby, beautiful birth, and so much knowledge and realization.

This is truly the best experience in my life. There is nothing that compares to it. Everything I learned, knew and loved came together at one moment. I felt complete and happy. And now I am on a new path of discovery of joy of natural and truly spiritual upbringing of my children, joyful living, true love and conscious conception.PS : I am just realizing that the way I feel ( physically ) is AMAZING. My baby is barely over a day old, I would not even be home from the hospital yet. Comparing to the other 2 births , I feel like I can run a marathon. Yes, I am tired, yes, I feel that my body delivered a baby, BUT I feel great - just like you WOULD feel after running a marathon : tired, worn out, but GREAT. I am really looking forward to applying 100% of everything I learned and more for the next birth, and having another wonderful experience.

by Rachel Talley

Fuel for the Fire!

This article was just as upsetting or maybe even more than the other articles I've been posting recently. Chris and I just finished watching "Happy Valley." For those who haven't seen it, I'd recommend you do so! Again...let me reiterate. I find it EXTREMELY scary the amount of personal power we give to so many different people and/or things around us. Be it doctors, pills, drugs, food, alcohol....you name it! We're all looking REALLY hard to find that emotional escape. Or as the Native American's say we're all "chasing a good day to die." If life isn't going the way we want it....we just pop a pill or eat or drink our feelings away. Or if we really want to have a baby, we're just so sick of being pregnant it's ok....we don't have to wait...we'll just cut it out!

We COMPLETLEY go agaisnt every part of ourselves that is telling us we can think and act for ourselves. That we can change with the help of true and faithful friends/family. That we can turn our True Source for insight and understanding to forward our need for change and clarity. So...I must ask... Can we all throw down the facade? Can we be honest with each other or more imporantly, ourselves, and make the needed changes to find peace within us? Can we raise our voices to speak our truth and stand up for those things we know bring true happiness? Most importantly, can we turn inward....into our own hearts and seek the courage and strength to ask for help and understanding from our Higher Power and FULLY and COMPLETELY believe that NO MATTER WHAT They are there for us and WANT to BE? I KNOW we can. I have faith in myself, my Higher Power, and HUMANITY!

I was watching a TV show awhile ago (one of the worst shows on birth on cable television I have seen yet) where a woman actually said she was scheduling a C-section for delivery because the "the old ways of having a baby were just too barbaric and we should use the new technology that has been given to us." I think I'm still in shock that those words actually came out of a pregnant woman's mouth! Anyway....read and judge your feelings for yourself. I'm so grateful that someone is doing something to bring it to light and expose the fact that things need to change. WHAT A BLESSING! Read on!

Abundant peace to all,

Rachel

Premature births: Utah earns a 'D' from March of Dimes study
By Heather May and The Salt Lake Tribune's news services
Updated: 11/13/2008 08:14:21 AM MST

With almost one in nine Utah babies born too early, the Beehive state is essentially failing when it comes to preventing premature birth, the leading cause of newborn deaths. Utah, like the nation as a whole, earned a D grade from the March of Dimes, which released its first Premature Birth Report Card Wednesday. One cause is women or doctors scheduling deliveries a couple of weeks before the due date without a medical reason. In response, there is a push by Utah doctors to refuse to electively induce labor or perform Cesarean sections unless a woman is one week or less away from her due date. Michael Varner, who helps oversee obstetrics research at the University

(Kristin Schalk, of Tooele, watches Wednesday as her daughter Ashlynn, 3, looks out the Intermountain Medical Center door. (Francisco Kjolseth/The Salt Lake Tribune )

of Utah, has heard the pleas: "They're 38 1/2 weeks [along] and they're tired of being pregnant. Their doctor is going out of town. It's a week before Christmas." But, he adds, "doctors should just say, 'No.' Hospitals should just say, 'No.' A spontaneous onset of labor and vaginal delivery is overall the safest."

Babies born even a couple of weeks early are at risk for respiratory and feeding problems, jaundice, long-term mental disabilities and sudden death, Varner said. A baby's brain at 35 weeks weighs two-thirds of what it will weigh at a full term of 40 weeks, according to the March

of Dimes. The nonprofit graded each state on its rate of premature births - defined as babies born at less than 37 weeks gestation. Utah's rate in 2005 was 11.4 percent, compared to the national 2010 goal of 7.6 percent. The U.S. rate was 12.7 percent. Vermont earned the only B grade, the highest mark given. Several states, mostly in the South, got Fs.

(Jessica Anderson, a registered nurse at Intermountain Medical Center, attends to 9-hour-old Jaxon Ottosen in the neonatal intensive care unit. Jaxon was born nearly two months premature, which a March of Dimes report suggests is a growing problem. (Francisco Kjolseth/The Salt Lake Tribune )

"The United States is failing our tiniest and youngest citizens on the very day they are born," said Amy Hansen, director of the Utah March of Dimes chapter at a news conference in the newborn intensive care unit at Intermountain Medical Center. Utah's premature birth rate has jumped 24 percent since 1995. Varner said the main reason is the number of babies delivered between 34 and 37 weeks, due to a rise in the number of twin and triplet births and improvements in care that allow doctors to deliver ill babies earlier.

Another reason is the "disturbing" trend of elective inductions or C-sections before 38 weeks, he said. It's hard to know how often that happens. Counting induced vaginal deliveries and C-sections, about half of Utah's 52,000 births are scheduled, though some of those are for medical reasons.

Noticing that such late pre-term deliveries lasted longer by several hours and caused more complications, Intermountain Healthcare created a policy a couple of years ago to reduce late-term elective inductions. Before inducing labor, women must be 39 weeks along and their body must be ready to deliver, as measured by a soft and dilated cervix.

In 1999, about 28 percent of all elective deliveries at Intermountain happened before 39 weeks. This summer, it was down to 2.6 percent, and those patients had to get the medical director's approval. Women shouldn't schedule their labor as if it's a haircut, said Janie Wilson, operations director of Intermountain's Women and Newborn Clinical Program.

A handful of pregnant women at IMC said they had no problem with the guidelines. "You're asking for more complications. Kids come when they're ready," said Wendy Dowdle, who is 36 weeks pregnant. She said her two other children arrived a little more than a week early naturally. Besides reducing late preterm births, there are other ways for women to prevent premature births: stop smoking, attain the right weight before pregnancy, space out pregnancies at least by 18 months and start prenatal visits in the first trimester.

by Rachel Talley

Swapping Breast Milk

WOW! How AWESOME is this quote? Boy, did I need it this morning! After the Thanksgiving hustle and bustle, I just was and am so INSPIRED by this quote.

"The time of business does not with me differ from the time of prayer, and in the noise and clatter of my kitchen, while several persons are at the same time calling for different things, I possess God in as great tranquility as if I were upon my knees at the blessed sacrament."
~Brother Lawrence

The Practice of the Presence of God

I just REALLY LOVE this quote. It just so HIT home for me. I have always thought about how I can really get into a space of peace and acceptance when so much CHAOS is constantly and consistently around me. We do live in a world that is so BUSY and GOING all the time that I have truly prayed about getting into that space where I can keep a prayer always in my heart. And I have only wondered that because I know how desperately I need it!

All this quote is telling me is that it's only about my perception. I can believe this quote to be the truth and then pray to have it realized and choose to see my world through that belief. I feel SO HAPPY about that. I'm gonna do it! In the process, I am sure because I am making this intention....I will first need to see what lies are holding me back from truly applying and believing this. YEAH! Here we go! Let all work on this together. Wanna? Then we can help each other move toward this PEACEFUL point of tranquility in each of our lives, no matter where we are or what is taking place.

Ok....so to switch gears....

HERE is a VERY interesting video about a group of woman sharing their breastmilk with each other. Of course, as you already know I'm sure, I think this is a BEAUTIFUL idea and one which has been around MUCH longer than the concept of formula or bottle feeding. I remember my husband's grandmother telling me stories of nursing her sisters baby for a year, along with her own. It was interesting to hear her tell it because, aside from the fact I had heard it several times, each time she told her she could comment at the end that she always felt VERY close to her niece. They had a bond she didn't have with any other of her nieces and nephews. I think that is SO SWEET!

Just a couple of my observations. I'm not understanding why this idea seems so new or foreign to people. Or that it seems strange or even disgusting. Read a few history books in regards to pregnancy or childbirth and you will see this is a practice that has been around for eons of time now. Remember "wet nurses?" They were around as early as 50 years ago. When I was hospitalized 7 years ago, my dear Millie was 4 months old. I was SO GRATEFUL for all my dear sisters and friends who breastfed her and donated breastmilk to me. I remember shedding tears over it. It was SO TOUCHING to me that other woman could and WOULD, even wanted to, love my lovely baby so much that they would share their life giving nutrition with her. What a blessing it was!

Another thought....so the doctor who states that we really shouldn't be passing breastmilk to each other because of all the bacteria. Are you kidding me? When are we going to come to the realization that LIFE is FULL of BACTERIA! People, it's all around us all the time. We can scrub, clean or disinfect a surface or item as much as you like but...I can promise you that as soon as any human contact touches it, it's contaminated again. I must admit here, I am MUCH MORE SCARED of chemicals than I am of bacteria. Chemicals are killing people left and right. Way more than bacteria is. Look at the number of hospital caused deaths each year. My personal belief is that is NOT bacteria killing people but all the CRAP we're putting in their bodies really thinking it's saving their lives. Some of it is saving their lives, I'm sure. But I think it's gone WAY overboard!! There is NOT BALANCE! It's all focused on the physical issues when in actuality we could change so much physically if we would look at our emotional worlds along with the physical.

The doctor then goes on to discuss how people can just purchase, for a mere $2200, enough breastmilk for their baby through the milk bank. Again, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? And....she points out, the GREAT (note the sarcasm) thing about the process they use is that they pasteurize the milk before you get it so it is SUPPOSEDLY bacteria free. (This is the ULTIMATE lie we tell ourselves, isn't it?) So...aside from the fact that now there is very little foreign or unwanted bacteria, (hahahahaha!) in the milk, we have also killed the majority of the nutrients and VERY beneficial enzymes. Guaranteed, we have also messed with the fat structures and who knows how our babies new little bodies will even deal with that? Seriously, I am laughing at this. Your going to pay THAT MUCH money for something that has been so deranged to the point that who knows how beneficial it really is anymore. I think you might as well use formula then. It's cheaper, right? I have to say....I LOVED the woman's comment at the end when she says something like....If it's good enough for their babies, then it's good enough for ours. LOVE IT! That was the BEST part of the whole video, I think. WAY TO GO, you breastmilk swapping woman. Keep up the AWESOME work. Your inspiring other woman to know they can do the same. I JUST LOVE IT!!

I know that I still haven't posted my feelings about the last post. I'm holding off a bit. I'm not sure if I am going to even share. I wonder if I had said enough from the 2 previous posts. I think my ideas and feelings in regards to pregnancy and birth have been VERY obvious. The one part about the article that was GREAT for me was that it answered one of my questions from the previous posts. I stated that I wondered how often doctors made choices out of feared of being sued. The article stated, and I quote "By far, the biggest reason for the increase is doctors' fear of being sued if something goes wrong during a vaginal birth. Need I say more.

COME ON, WOMAN! Let's stand up for ourselves, our babies, our bodies and MOST IMPORTANTLY, each other. Let's own our voices in a loving way and speak the truth in regards to vaginal births. Let's show an example through our actions and our voices of what birth is and can be. Let's teach woman they don't have to be afraid of this or that. Let's teach woman that fear is what has brought us to this point. We, of course, can give 10,000 other excuses as to why we may want a c-section instead of a vaginal birth but their merely excuses brought about by fear of the unknown.

I think I've said enough. Are you inspired? Ready to face the birthing world? I hope so! Most importantly, let's all strive to be there for each other. To be a sounding board of support, love and strength...no matter what way a woman chooses to deliver. Let's educate woman on all their options. Maybe....just maybe....they will feel their own strength and courage to be able to face within themselves what they didn't want to face. I don't know. I'm realizing that the more I think I learn, the less I really know. These are just my thoughts and opinions. So...don't listen to me. Turn to your own hearts. They have all the answers you need to know what's best for you and your LITTLE, TINY, INNOCENT, FULL OF LOVE, bundle of joy!!

Abundant peace to all,

Rachel

by Rachel Talley

What the @#%?

My gagging reflex is so out of control after reading this article, I can't even type my feelings about it! I will type more once the nausea has subsided! Rachel

P.S. I'm posting a picture of Mabel with this article so we can stay focused on the fact that a human life is what we are discussing here.

P.P.S. Oh BTW, HAPPY THANKSGIVING to you all! It's 12:30 am and officially the day of appreciation and gratitude. So...here we go! At this VERY moment, I am SO MOSTLY grateful for all of my 5 AMAZING and BEAUTIFUL homebirths. Especially my last 3 waterbirths. For the many woman, friends and loved ones, who empowered me to have faith in myself, my baby, my body, and most importantly my Heavenly Parents and our brother, Jesus Christ. HOLY COW! Am I EVER so THANKFUL!!!

More Young Women Opting To Schedule C-Section Births

By HILARY WALDMAN

Special To The Courant

November 24, 2008

The night before their son was born, Elisa Girard and her husband shared dinner at a romantic waterfront restaurant and toasted the fact that, the next morning, they would become parents.The timing was certain. Long before she learned the gender of her growing baby, or chose his name, Girard told her doctor that she didn't want to leave anything about his birth to chance.

As a doctor herself, Girard, now 33, had seen some women suffer from complications of labor and delivery that can include incontinence and pelvic floor weakness. She believed a C-section might be a healthier approach.But, added Girard, the chief resident in OB-GYN at St. Francis Hospital and Medical Center, "I liked the idea of having it planned in a calm atmosphere."The era of back-to-nature childbirth is giving way to a new trend.A growing number of healthy young women across the country are putting the dates of impending Caesarean sections into their calendars, scheduling thebirth of the children with the same foresight and precision as locking downa haircut or an important meeting.

The planned C-section gained cachet among celebrity moms about four yearsago, when Time magazine dubbed former Spice Girl Victoria (Posh Spice)Beckham "Too Posh to Push." By last year, the trend had crept so far beyond Hollywood that the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology weighed in- telling doctors that it's OK to perform a C-section on demand, as long ascertain safety precautions are followed.Still, purely elective C-sections remain a minor contributor to the nation'srecord Caesarean delivery rate, which hit an all-time high in 2005, the mostrecent year for which figures are available. That year, more than one-third of the 4 million babies born in the United States were delivered byC-section.

By far, the biggest reason for the increase is doctors' fear of being sued if something goes wrong during a vaginal birth. Other contributors include research suggesting that vaginal births for babies in a breech position or mothers who have had a previous C-section may not be as safe as they were once considered.But although fewer than 3 percent of Caesareans are considered purely elective, doctors, midwives and other experts say they reflect a dramatic change in the way women in Connecticut are approaching childbirth."The expectation of birth is now something you want to plan, push a button and take the baby home," said Dr. Carolyn M. Zelop, the director of maternal and fetal medicine at St. Francis."I want to leave with my little bikini incision, and here I go," Zelop said."These are people who think that's the ultimate control."

Changing Approach

Twenty years ago, women had a dramatically different idea of control.Childbirth education classes were packed to capacity with women who wanted to give birth as naturally as possible. Anesthesia, fetal monitors and episiotomies were considered conventions of a male-dominated medical profession that wanted to take a beautifully slow and messy process and makeit quick and sterile.The thinking has changed."I've lived through the era of 'Don't come near me with anesthesia,' " said Dr. Matthew L. Saidel, an OB-GYN at Hartford Hospital who has been delivering babies for decades.

Today, Saidel quips, he has patients who ask for an epidural (anesthesia) when they step off the elevator on the labor and delivery floor.Reasons for choosing a C-section vary. Professional women sometimes like to clear their business calendar before going out on maternity leave. Some try to schedule a birth so out-of-town relatives can arrive in time to help.Others have a husband in the military who may be heading for deployment overseas. Still others have religious or spiritual convictions about the timing of birth and believe that being born on a certain date or at a certain time or when the stars are in a certain alignment can set up an infant for an auspicious life. And there are some days when nobody wants to deliver. This past Sept. 11, no one scheduled a C-section delivery at St. Francis, said Laura Bailey, nurse manager of the New Beginnings Family Birth Care Unit at St. Francis. Friday the 13th is also an unpopular date.

Doctors tell women that a C-section can be safe if the mother-to-be has passed the 39-week mark of an uncomplicated 40-week pregnancy and if she is sure she does not want more than two children.After two Caesareans, the risk increases for complications that can cause uncontrollable bleeding and end with a hysterectomy or worse.But the ability to choose a C-section is so new that many questions remain.

Some studies suggest that conventional labor and vaginal delivery stimulates and strengthens a baby's lungs better than a C-section.And a study by Yale researchers published in the October 2008 issue of the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry hints that the bonds that tie a mother to her newborn may be stronger in women who deliver vaginally.

Complications

On the other side of the debate, Dr. Christine A. LaSala, a Hartford Hospital urogynecologist, said she has seen women's bodies ravaged by multiple vaginal deliveries, including problems such as incontinence and sagging pelvic organs. LaSala scheduled a C-section when it was time to deliver her first child, a daughter, in January."There seems to be a correlation to vaginal childbirth with these problems,"LaSala said. And, to be certain, the ability to deliver a baby surgically has saved the lives of countless mothers and their babies, especially since about 1940,when doctors began to refine the art of childbirth in hospitals.

Elisa Girard is careful to stress that the decision to have a scheduled C-section is strictly personal and says she would never encourage her patients to opt for surgery strictly out of convenience. But recently completed research suggests that more women will be able to make the choice if they wish to.Girard recently surveyed all of the nation's resident physicians training to become OB-GYNs. Of the 459 who responded, 71 percent said they had performed an elective C-section during their residency, and 74 percent said they would be willing to perform elective C-sections once they go into practice."The residents are the future," Girard said. "It gives us an idea of what the trend will be."

by Rachel Talley

Reclaiming Our Innate

I received this in my email this morning. You have got to be kidding me! Someone tell me what has happened to COMPLETELY understanding the concept of the importance of nursing? Especially when it comes to hospital protocol of premature babies. I recognize that all hospitals are not the same but SHEESH!!

HERE is the link to watch the video. So, we have a situation where milk based formula is killing premature babies because of a certain bacteria that eats away at body tissues. Can you believe this? It seems that one of the cases, the mother was offering that her breastmilk to be fed to her infant but because of hospital protocol, they fed the baby milk based infant formula without the mother even knowing.

Let's see....hospital protocol. WOW! What a WONDERFUL thing! It's there to protect us from each other and ourselves, right? HOLY COW! I feel so frustrated with how many woman I have spoke with who express there negative outcomes in regards to their births all because of hospital protocol. I will ask them, "So, why did the doctor or hospital do that?" Their response, "I don't know....I guess it was hospital protocol." Guaranteed it was! I had a situation where I attended one of my sister's births. After the delivery, the nurse took her daughter over to the warmer and left her there, naked and shivering, while she went on to attend to other things. I asked the nurse if I could swaddle my niece and pick her up so she could calm down and really get warm. She stated to me that I could not. When I questioned her as to why not, in a VERY irritated tone, she went on to say that she needed to stay on the warmer until her body temperature reached a certain level. She said it was HOSPITAL PROTOCOL! Ok, is it just me but is there logic in this thinking? I'll give them a little credit, maybe some. The warmer was warm but the hospital room was FREEZING, as they always seem to be and I have a hard time truly believing that my niece's body temperature would reach the needed levels for her to then be wrapped and given to her mom. Well, to say the least, I finally just wrapped her in a warm blanket and proceeded to pick her up. As you all already know, the minute I did so, she immediately stopped crying and relaxed.

My thinking then is what devastation are we placing in the emotional lives of so many laboring woman and dear sweet BABIES just so we can follow hospital protocol? And so often....when the mothers questions the illogical ideology of the protocol, doctors and nurses tend to show obvious irritation. I guess because they feel they know best and ALL of US should just comply with their requests. If we don't comply, then sure enough they will then move on to fear tactics to induce the change they are looking for.

Now understand please, I am not saying this is ALWAYS the case. There are some VERY good doctors/nurses out there who do their best to strive to really listen to their patients and fulfill what they feel would be the most helpful for their particular situation. I am wondering how we got to a place where we truly believe that someone knows us better than we know ourselves. Similar to the video yesterday, the one hospital ruled out doulas at their hospital for fear they would speak up against hospital protocol. HEAVEN FORBID!

Can we all think about free agency? God's rightly and divinely gifted blessing that let's each of us learn from our own choices and really experience life in such a way that we can move forward in life the way we choose is best for us! But no....that is not to be it seems, in so many aspects of life, but DEFINITELY when you enter a hospital. Please know, that I am forever indebted to the men who aided in saving my life on, at least, 2 occasions. The way I see it, the hospital can and should truly be a place of healing and a teaching ground for giving people the opportunity to first and foremost, trust themselves and then pray that they doctors/nurses they've been given can also be trusted to do what is best for them. I wonder, how often do you think that a doctors choice of how to treat his/her patient is based in a place of fear? Do doctors choose to treat/act a certain way for fear of being sued? Do they constantly ask the liability question before asking what would really be BEST? I don't know. I'm not a doctor and never plan to be one. I'm just, sort of, thinking out loud here. I really WONDER!

So...I ask the question, because the hospital has so much potential to really be a place where true healing and health does take place, can we, as a society, lessen our pride and really learn how to LISTEN to each other? Can we break down our own walls of "high mindedness" and belief that because we've educated ourselves or because someone has a certain education, we or they know best and we should just turn over our own beliefs and power to them? Or that someone should really listen to us and follow our counsel because we know what is truly best for them? COME ON! How do we really know? WE don't know. We can't know. And to be honest, we'll NEVER know.

My belief is until we get to the place where we choose love and free agency WAY above and beyond our own pride or even deeper, what we believe to be our own KNOWING (because we have a certain education, credetinals, certification etc.), we will keep running in these same circles of feeling COMPLETELY dissatisfied with each other and even more often, with ourselves. We can't in ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM completely blame the doctors/nurses or whoever for the frustration we feel. Let us not forget, we gave over our power to them. We choose to let them tell us what is best for us and our baby. We choose to believe that they always know better than our inner knowing. We choose to believe that they have the power of God and can with the lifting of a knife, save us or our babies. We choose to believe that all will be safe and well when we enter a hospital and that any risks will be circumvented because of their knowledge and education.

So...I could sit here and could rant even more about the medical system but I've choose not to! They are not the problem, we are. We, especially as pregnant woman, choose to tap into our own fears of pregnancy and childbirth and turn our own inate wisdom over to someone else, and then blame them for the outcome we did not like. That's how I see it anyway. Does that mean when we enter a hospital we need to be non compliant or even angry or mean? Heaven's NO! The way I see it, that means if we feel we need the assistance of what the hospital has to offer, we enter it full well knowing of what might or could take place and in a VERY LOVING way, stand UP for what we believe in. We enter retaining our personal dignity and power by having taken the time to educate ourselves on what the process of pregnancy and birth or even whatever it is we are needing to enter the hospital for. We stand firm but kind, in our resolve to listen to ourselves and our HIGHER POWER! Whatever or whoever that is for you!

My belief is once we can all get to a space where we have worked out our fears, when we enter a space of control we can still receive what we need in a loving, gentle way because we keep our hearts pure by standing up for ourselves. Our perception changes and what we receive then is SO MUCH BETTER than what we ever thought we could. That's what happens when we honor that place inside of us that truly and deeply knows what would create the ULTIMATE outcome for happiness for us! What would happen if we all did that? What would happen if we all turned our hearts and searched for our inner peace? What would happen if we each decided HERE and NOW to take our own inner knowing BACK and really LISTEN to it instead of all the outside voices that we think know more?

I throw out to each of you to really think about this concept and if it rings true to you, then RIGHT NOW at this moment....APPLY IT! Search for understanding of how and in what ways you can really do that. I know I am. I know I am one PRIDEFUL woman who so many times in my life thinks I know what is best for someone else. But...I really don't. I REALLY DON'T! I can only listen to what my heart is teaching me and then share that with others and if it something they are also meant to apply and learn, then SO BE IT! We can then grow and learn together how to keep listening to our hearts and our heads and not someone else's mouth.

Ok....I think I'm done now. Maybe I will have more tomorrow. There is a SLC Tribune article I may want to discuss soon. We'll see. I hope my words come through clearly. Let's look at our own selves if we want to see change in the world around us. That is the ONLY way it will happen. In my humble opinion anyway. LOL!!

Abundant peace to all,
Rachel

by Rachel Talley

Dear Doulas

Hello again. I am SO sorry for the extended delay in my posting. I really had planned on trying to post sooner but...life has been coming quite quickly and steadily lately. Which is SO EXCITING for me! Can I just say that I LOVE people? I LOVE THEM! I LOVE connecting with people. I LOVE watching people. I LOVE learning from people. I LOVE feeling with people. I LOVE talking with people. I am just so in LOVE with people right now.

I have been learning and truly "getting" how disconnected from people I really am. Especially the ones I LOVE the most. It's so interesting to me how probably the MOST SCARY feeling for us is LOVE! To let love in REALLY....to be vulnerable....to fully give ourselves in a soft hearted way to each and every person we are connected to! I have spent some much time in prayer seeking, understanding, really integrated into my soul this idea. I desire and LONG to put it into full practice.

So...to change avenues here, I received THIS in my email box today. Click on it and watch it and tell me what you think. This is SHEER craziness. Heaven forbid...a doula speak up to the hospital staff who SUPPOSEDLY always knows better, right? OH, SO WRONG! This video kind of got me going this morning.

First, the positives. I think it's SO GREAT that the doula really helped her client and they had that aspect shown on the video. Hopefully, people really wanting to know about and understand doulas will glean the changes made in the woman's birth because of the doula and go on the research it themselves. That is always a BEAUTIUFL thing. To know that if someone is wanting something then something like this video can, at least, open their eyes to it.

Now...you have got to be KIDDING me that we should ALWAYS tell our doctor and clear everything with them. I'm not saying that that can't be a benefical thing. What I am saying is....or the way I see it is....we are then saying to ourselves and pretty much the rest of society that I freely and fully give my birth power over to someone else and they can tell me if something is good or not good for me and my baby. Cuz SUPPOSEDLY they know best, right? Can I say SO WRONG again?

Even with the friends whom I have helped, I may have new insights, educational knowledge, ideas, concepts etc. that could or may could not help her. But I am NOT HER!! I am not in her body. I am not in her brain and DEFINITELY I am not in her heart. How do I know what is best or not best for her and her birth?

Well, you could say in the moment of birth then I could tell her what to do and what is safe or not safe for her, right? WRONG AGAIN! I DEFINITELY and RIGHTLY SO would throw out ideas, suggestions, even persuasive comments about what I think would help to create a safer or easier birth situation but ULTIMATELY it is HER say NOT mine. Let me reiterate. I am NOT in her body. I am NOT in her mind and I DEFINITELY am not in her HEART!

My belief and experience thus far, is that when a woman is TRULY preparing herself physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually that she will inherently know what is BEST for her body and her baby. At any and all moments. If things are going great or things look a bit scary. When there might be a crisis or when all is going well. It really doesn't matter. When a mother is FULLY prepared, in all realms of her life, and is going into the birth process understanding fully what she may have to deal with or look at or change or whatever....she KNOWS what is BEST....hands down EVERYTIME!!

2 words. Trust and Faith. I have realized you cannot go to a birth and feel ok with the whole process of it without applying those 2 words. I cannot EXPRESS FULLY enough the WONDERFULNESS of the "Birth as We Know it" video and the "Birth Into Being" website. It will COMPLETELY change your perspective on what CONSCIOUS birth is and HOW to apply it to you and your birth.

Then on top of all that is taught through that AMAZING video and website, I have learned of and applied so many other emotional and physical aspects during my pregnancy that I am still in AWE of all that I insights I have gained over the past couple of years. PEOPLE....it is so much FUN! It is so EXCITING to me to share it with others. I am OVERJOYED with how the mothers I am involved with feel and GROW during the process of releasing and rebuilding themselves and their babies. LOVE IT! LOVE IT!

Anyway...I think I'm done now. I am happy that I could share. Thanks for reading. I hope each woman will gain the empowerment they need to know they can create what they want with each and every pregnancy and birth. I LOVE YOU ALL!

Abundant peace to all,

Rachel

by Rachel Talley

Joseph Aaron's Birth Story

"Paradoxically, we achieve true wholeness only by embracing our fragility and sometimes, our brokenness. Wholeness is a natural radiance of Love, and Love demands that we allow the destruction of our old self for the sake of the new."
~Jalaja Bonheim

Aphrodite's Daughters

I LOVE this quote. I have been waiting for the PERFECT time to share it and I believe it goes right along with Lyndsey's birth story. My belief is that Lyndsey's birth was as GLORIOUS as it was merely because she was ready and willing to let go of the old patterns of what she called LOVE to retrieve the new. She sought to gather up and look at her weakness and brokenness (as is stated above) to enter a rebirth of herself. A new relationship and connection with herself, her loved, her Savior and her Heavenly Parents. It is BEAUTIFUL to watch. Just like a sunrise or sunset. It happens over and over but each time looks and feels different. When we are really looking at us, each experience teaches us something new but it feels COMPLETELY like home. I hope you enjoy her birth story as much as I did!

Abundant peace to all,

Rachel

Words cannot express the gratitude I have for the you, Rachel, my soul sister! You have inspired me to reach inside myself and see my true beauty! I prepared for this birth physically, spiritually, and mentally and can testify to all you women out there, when you fully prepare you will be astounded at the results! We, as women are so powerful and we need to claim that power!

Before I tell my story I have to talk about my journal entry about how I wanted my birth to be. Rachel suggested I write what I wanted my birth to be like in detail. I completely forgot about it until after my birth and she asked me how close it was to my entry, and I was shocked to remember it was almost spot on!

My contractions started at about 12:30 am and were about 5-8 minutes apart. At this point I don't remember them being painful, just uncomfortable enough to not be able to sleep through. So I went into my living room and lit my prayer candles. (a few days prior to my birth I wrote inspiring words on candles and said a prayer to go along with them) I turned on my birth mix of music, which was beautifully soothing. It was a combination of tibetan singing bowls, an artist named Deuter, who is amazing, and some celtic instrumentals. As each of my contractions came I would spiral my hips, which I had learned from a beautiful movie called Birth As We Know It, and it helped move the energy through my pelvis. It felt great! This was a very peaceful time for me, and it lasted for about 3 hours. My contractions then slowed to one every ten minutes, and I knew from my previous birth that I should try to sleep. So I laid on my couch with my music still on and slept. When my husband woke up they slowed even more, and I told him to go ahead and go to work. I had been checking myself and knew I was only at four centimeters, and with the contractions being slow I figured they wouldn't start back up again until night.

I had a great morning with my daughter. We watched a movie and read some books and when she went to take a nap i took one as well.After about an hour they picked up again to one every ten minutes and were getting really powerful! I called my husband to come home just because I wanted some support. At this point i still thought it would be awhile. He got home around 2 and by then they were extremely powerful and about every 3-5 minutes apart. We hurried to blow up and fill up the pool and by about 2:45 we had managed to fill it half way. In the mean time I had called Rachel to come. I couldn't check myself anymore because of how close they were, but knew this baby was coming! Spiraling was no longer helping. The only thing I could do at this point was a low moan, and knew from the birth of my daughter that this meant I was either lightly pushing or was soon to be pushing. Rachel arrived at 3 and by then I was ready to push. I was so frightened she wouldn't make it in time, and when she arrived I was so relieved. Even though I am sure things would have turned out fine had she not gotten there in time, having a woman there for me is amazingly helpful. She encouraged me and reminded me of the power that I had and soon I was feeling my babies head move through my perineum! It was amazing! I helped stretch my skin as his head slowly came out, and soon after I was reaching down to pick Joseph out of the water! I can't describe to you the euphoria I was experiencing at this time, along with shock that he came so FAST!

So that is my story. I am honored to be a woman and to have this responsibility of bringing these beautiful souls into the world, and someday I hope to be like Rachel in helping other woman recognizing and carrying out this beautiful task! Thank you so much for letting me share my story with you!

With Love,
Lyndsey Merrill

by Rachel Talley

Movin' Mabel

My dear sweet friend, DeLynn, emailed me the other day asking me if I knew what she did for a living, wondering if I knew she was a photographer. She stated that she had been reading my blog and noticed that people were asking for pictures of Mabel. She asked if she could come over and take pictures of her for FREE! OF COURSE SHE CAN!! So...on Halloween morning she showed up with all her gear and took some AMAZINGLY DELICIOUS pictures of Mabel. I've posted the one up top first because this is Chris' and I favorite. Probably because up until the last couple of weeks, seeing her like this was a VERY common occurrence. Here are some more! I hope you all enjoy them as much as we do! Thank you, DeLynn. I LOVE YOU! Don't fret, soon enough....you will be posting some of your own on your blog! Mabel was 4 months old on the 28th of October. She, well as of last week, weighed 10 1/2 lbs. She's probably a bit closer to 11 lbs now. Still not as big as my sister, Amy's, 11 lb. baby at birth. LOL!! She started rolling 5 days ago. She rolls all around back and forth across the room. She can pick up toys and play with them. Well....put them in and out of her mouth, right? She is the CUTEST thing. She has brought such JOY to all of us! Since she has been a bit more mobile, she has been SO MUCH HAPPIER! She loves to be put on the floor and look around and grab at stuff. The CUTEST thing she does though is when she's tired on the floor, she just lays her head down and rests. Sometimes for 5+ minutes at a time. She looks just so content and serene.

My feelings were that she was having a hard time really wanting to incarnate into this LOVELY body of hers. I don't blame her. Goodness....just feeling all the sensations and such of birth (not to mention just living the rest of life :) would probably put any baby into a state of.....HOLY COW, do I really want to be here? So....as I stated, really up until the last few weeks, she had a hard time being really happy and feeling free. Chris and I have talked to her off and on about being ok about being here until Chris finally gave her a blessing and told her we loved her, we were here for her, and all would be ok. We told her we would teach her of her Savior and Heavenly Parents and all would be well and as it should be. It has seemed that literally just a week or so after that she has become a whole new baby. I LOVE IT! I can tell energetically that she is just so much more at peace with the world and her life here!! Oh....I think we had to process a bit about her birth too. You know, she was born with the cord around her neck and such. I think that makes it a bit more traumatic. We just kept reminding her that we REALLY, REALLY want her here and are so HAPPY she chose our home.

I must admit, I am getting more and more excited about doing this all over again. As I said before.....it was a bit hard at first. But now, I find it THRILLING to apply all the new insights and inspirations we have gleaned over the last couple of years, in regards to parenting and loving communication, especially. Chris has been WAY MORE involved than ever! It brings tears to my eyes to just sit back and watch him with her. She knows him so well too! I can tell her we're gonna see Daddy and her eyes light up and she sings and coos to me! I feel so HAPPY!!

I am rereading "Nonviolent Communication" again. One of my favorite books. I really want to get his parenting book. I read this about 3 or so years ago and have applied some from the book but have forgotten so much too! Habitual behavior had snuck back in. I have found though that applying the teachings from that book along with group, energy work, sweat lodges, breath ceremonies and all the TOTALLY GROOVY, AWESOME emotional processing things we do lately.....my connection with all my family has become deeper and more bonded. I am sure it is because I am choosing to be ok with myself and the find gratitude in the world around me. Some days I am so good at that and others days I pray for it!! But....I think I have worked through some more energy over this weekend so today I am feeling PEACEFUL and ALIVE again.

I think that's it for now. There is a so BEAUTIFUL quote I have been wanting to share so check back. It SO APPLIES to my life right now. I read it the other morning and had some new FUN epiphanies.

Abundant peace to all,
Rachel

P.S. I'll post more pics, wait did I already say that?.....ok....well, I will post more pics of Mabel soon!

by Rachel Talley

My Soul's Song of Gratitude

As you already know, 2 days ago one of my friends delivered a BEAUTIFUL baby boy! Her birth was quick, efficient and very uneventful! She spent her whole pregnancy, even several months before she became pregnant, preparing her heart, mind, body and soul to prepare for the future birth to come! She was rigorous and extremely effective in carrying out her divinely gifted creative power. It was/is such a overwhelmingly LOVELY process to be a part of! I LOVE being a part of something that is so UNIQUE to each and every woman! I am just AMAZED and in AWE of each birth I attend. I feel so blessed to participate in watching the strength and courage of woman. I feel so blessed to see each of them put their faith and trust in themselves, their Heavenly Parents and their Savior. I feel so blessed to be given the gift from our Divine Mother to empower and inspire woman to believe and trust in themselves, their bodies and their babies.

I see within each woman that I work with a willingness to go beyond the mark and look deep into their own hearts at the fears, sadness, heartache, pain, anger, etc. that they each carry. I see within each woman the push for a progressive forward motion to move these emotions and give them to the Savior through repentance and forgiveness. I see within each woman the peace, joy, love, understanding, faith, wisdom, happiness etc. that replace each negative emotion. I feel overjoyed, humbled, and the power of the grace of God at each birth I attend. My heart is full of gratitude this morning for this sacred calling that only brings pure bliss to my soul which is hopefully then carried to each woman.....each of my earthly sisters that they can find the same bliss, in what sings to their hearts, that I have found.

I wo

uld like to share some feelings about the 2 inspiring woman I work with. I so appreciate my dear friend, Alicia. I so appreciate how you just "trust" the process of birth so explicitly. This trust then carries over to all people present at the birth. I so appreciate how your willingness to come and be present with complete adoration, even with your VERY crazy busy life, shines through. I so appreciate how much you have taught me on this path. I so appreciate the LONG hours and excessive time you have spent with me teaching me, being patient with me and just loving me through this process. And how without you.....I wonder if I would even be doing what I am doing. You have helped to change and uplift me and I am forever indebted because of it! Thank you! I LOVE YOU!

Also, I would like to sing Yulia's praises. I LOVE YOU, Yolka! She has been with me on a few of the last births I have done. She has been EXTREMELY helpful physically but also emotionally and spiritually! The spirit she carries at each birth, helps bring such peace and confidence to myself, the mother and even all people involved. Yulia, I am grateful for the power of womanhood you carry. You do and are willing to pass a little of that onto each of us unconfident woman who still carry of fears and phobias in regards to who we are and what our place is in the world. I feel honored and blessed (my 2 favorite words, btw) that you have chosen to walk this path with me right now.

I hope and pray that each you will do so for years to come! I hope and pray that we can help and uplift each other to bring about change within ourselves and all of our sisters that call upon us for aid and comfort. I hope and pray that we can keep working together and form relationships with each other that brings about united harmony and goodness, not only for ourselves but for all living things.

Lastly, Lyndsey...my heart feels so close to you! I LOVE YOU TOO! You are my sister! I believe we were very close at another place and time. Our souls sing to each other. Thank you for letting me be part of something so sacred and special to you! Thank you for the opportunity of listening to my heart's song because you listened to yours. Thank you for trusting each and every experience throughout your pregnancy that brought you closer to yourself. Thank you for seeing a little bit of our Divine Mother within yourself and then spreading that light to all around you! I can't say thank you enough for your efforts and my progression because of them!

Anyway....my heart sings this morning for all gifts given to each of us from our Heavenly Father, our Divine Mother, and our Savior. I pray we can all choose to be true disciples of Him and work "line upon line" to find and give our whole selves and full hearts to Him. Our Savior loves us not because we are good but because he is good! May we all strive each and every minute of everyday to be a little more like Him.

I love you all! I thank each and everyone of you for being part of our lives and accepting and loving us through thick and thin. Words cannot fully express my feelings this morning but I only pray that my feelings are felt by all of you!

Abundant peace to all,

Rachel

by Rachel Talley

Uneventful Bliss

"Even Socrates, who lived a very frugal and simple life, loved to go to the market. When his students asked about this, he replied, "I love to go and see all the things I am happy without."~Jack Kornfield After the Ecstasy, the Laundry

Today I attended an AMAZINGLY BEAUTIFUL birth of a dear friend of mine. I was and am honored to have been there to participate and experience the ecstatic joy with her and her family. She had a dear baby boy. Born at 3:21 pm. 7lbs. 10ozs. 19 inches. Quick, efficient and very uneventful! Just like we like it! WAY TO GO....Lyndsey! Your dear babies birth brought tears to my eyes and a deeper love for all things, to my heart! I love you, my dear sister!

I deeply revere the opportunity I have to uplift, empower and inspire woman to reclaim within themselves all things feminine and creative. It is a blessing and gift from our Divine Mother and pray that I can use it with the purest intent. Each and every one of us woman are sisters. We all have the same blessing and gift. Let us gather it up inside of ourselves and together sing it out to all loving and living things!

Peace to all,

Rachel

by Rachel Talley

Back in Babyland

Can you tell I have been busy with a baby with how little I have posted? My goodness! Babyland is alot of work. I COMPLETELY forgot! It seems almost foreign to me, to a certain extent. I feel like a first time mom all over again. It is s bit different just because I have done it before and there is an aspect of it that is similar to riding a bike. Even if you haven't done it in awhile you can just hop on and ride away.

So.....I don't have the totally blank stare that you see on first time moms where you know there are feeling so lost with what to do. But....I do have the, oh my gosh, did I REALLY do this 4 times before, every 2 years, and not lose my mind? Or maybe I did and I just think I didn't because every mother who has children loses her mind, so in reality we think we are normal but really aren't?

Anyway, to say the least, life has been a bit overwhelming for me. Of course, more emotional issues have arisen. The first month seemed like the BIGGEST emotional roller coaster I have been on in awhile. Lots of unexpected twists and turns, up and downs. My poor husband and kids. I was laughing one minute while crying the next.

It was always FUN for me though to figure out what was going on, why I was feeling that way, and get honest. As you all know, I'm a bit weird that it is so exciting for me to delve into my own psyche and feelings and get as clear as possible. I feel renewed and refreshed when all is said and done. I can DEFINITELY see the difference of the release each time and my family has said they can too!

I was trying to decide if I should share how hard it's been. I don't want to complain or even add more to it than it really is. The interesting part of the situation is that even though I can look outside myself and see that it is challenging, I can also see that I am dealing with it so much better than I would have in the past. I have been grateful that this has been the case. I am even more grateful though that I can see it and be grateful for it.

Oh, I wanted to let everyone know (well those of you who read my blog) that I am starting up nutritional counseling, energy work and pipe ceremonies. I haven't seen people for awhile just because of the craziness of our lives. But I have been feeling "called" again to actively help those who might want or need it. I can do phone consults too! So for those interested, please email rachel@livingmom.net. Also, I have some exciting things in the works in regards to my website and maybe some AMAZING superfoods that will be available to all! Keep checking back to, hopefully soon, see the new and improved site along with some NEW and EXCITING stuff!

My diet has gotten much stricter over the last few weeks. Mabel showed up with thrush about 3 weeks ago. I believe that as sweet little babies do.....she has decided to help carry my resentment for me. I have prayed about this with her and held some good pipe ceremonies with my husband. It is now MUCH better than it originally was. I jumped onto my 80/10/10 diet which I tend to feel the BEST on. So my fat intake has been lower than it was when I was pregnant. Not much though. It is now almost gone. I eat fruit all day long with a raw veggie seaweed role for dinner. SO DELICIOUS!

So... 1 week after Mabel's birth, I was back in my prepregnancy clothes. That was AMAZING to me! It has been such a blessing to not have to worry about trying to lose weight. I gained 60 lbs. in one of my pregnancies and I remember just feeling so saddened by the amount of weight I wanted and needed to lose. I was going to take pictures and post them but really you can just look at any other pictures on my site and that's what I look like. I must add here that I absolutely cherish not wearing a bra. I know that is a totally random thought but I have worn one only a handful of times since she's been born. SO LOVING IT!! I say all woman should go without bras. I don't know if it's true or not but, hands down, a man made up a bra.....not a woman.

All done for today. Love you all!! I will post again soon. Hopefully, sooner than this last time.

Peace to all,
Rachel

by Rachel Talley

Mabel Carroll's Birth Story:Part 2

My labor actually started Friday morning, June 27th. The night before I noticed the contractions were stronger than usual but that didn't seem strange since over the past couple of weeks they had changed from braxton hicks to stronger and stronger "real" contractions. By Friday morning when they still seemed somewhat consistent, it seemed my labor would be typical of all of my other births. With the stronger contractions from the night before, by morning I thought I would probably have the baby that night.

So....Friday day, we went and hung out at my sister in law Yulia's house and the contractions were getting stronger and stronger. By late afternoon, we were pretty sure I was really in labor. You must know that with each labor I go through the same "acceptance and denial" routine. I spend the day trying to decide if I am really in labor while going through the whole emotional gamete of feelings that arise as I realize I am.

I called my husband crying when I clued in that I am, in fact, in labor.... and then I repeat the same scernio all over again when I call my midwife to tell her. It's actually quite funny when I look back on it after it's all said and done. It was actually really FUN to be at Yulia's house while in labor because she was SO EXCITED for me to be having the baby. It made it easier to get excited about it too! Thanks Yulia! I LOVE YOU!

By late afternoon, I knew this had to be real and prepared for her to be born the same as my other kids which was around midnight that night. So Chris called my mother in law, Louise to come and pick up the kids. Chris and I had plans to go out with some friends. We kept them just because I refused to sit around thinking about being in labor when my contractions were still not bad enough that I had to fully focus on them. With my previous births, by 8 or 9 at night, I am in strong active labor and the babies are born by 11 or 12. But by 8 or 9 Friday night, my contractions were still coming but had fizzled quite a bit.

The dinner was nice. We went and ate at one of my favorite places. It's a Greek place in Orem and they have DELICIOUS Greek salads. I just get it with no cheese. As we sat in the restaurant Chris kept asking me if I was still having contractions which I was, they were just not as strong as they had been a couple hours before. I was thinking "What if I am wrong? What if this is "false labor?" I have NEVER had "false" labor before so I thought it was weird that I was SO off about this one. At least, they were still coming and they weren't bad at all.

We came back home around 10 pm and my kids were SO ECSTATIC to think we were going to have the baby soon. We decided to go on a family walk since I still couldn't sit and just relax and didn't really want too! We came home and just sat and watched TV. Then I laid in bed and played solitaire until about 1 am.

Sure enough, as soon as I put my head on the pillow to sleep my contractions picked up again. They proceeded to come every 10 or so minutes the whole night. (which actually wasn't that bad because luckily with 4 other kids and busy life I could still sleep in between just fine) Until around 9 am, I woke Chris to rub my back because I was having VERY powerful back labor. (For those out there who have had it, you know the JOY of back labor) I remember having this with my first and with my 2nd, 3rd and 4th realizing how much easier birth can be without it. It was somewhat disheartening to me to recognize that I was having it again with this one.

Soon after waking Chris to rub my back, I remember with each contraction thinking "We should probably call Cathy and let her know what is going on." But when the contraction was over I would think "No, these aren't that bad." It was really funny because the contractions were about 5 minutes apart (mind you, we never timed them....I'm just guessing) at this point, and the contractions were pretty dang strong but when they were done I kept deciding they weren't that bad but during them...WHOA....I knew I was going to be having the baby soon. Finally Chris said "Yeah, you should call Cathy" so I did. We proceeded to wait for Cathy to come to put the tub together and get that all ready for when the time comes that I want to get in the water. We called her around 10 and she showed up about 11 am.

Now I have posted that I really wanted to try an unassisted birth. Chris was supportive of it but was having a hard time with the whole idea just because he felt he would then be responsible if anything were to happen. This stressed him out.....BIG TIME! We talked about it and I COMPLETELY understood. Cathy had already contacted me when I was first pregnant requesting that she would LOVE to come to my birth. She had been to all the others and so I knew it was exciting for her to participate in another one. I thought it was so sweet how much she wanted to be there and help out. Looking back now, Chris and I are SO THANKFUL she was there. We feel it was Divine Intervention that we chose to have her come. She was such a BLESSING at the birth and while in labor, I remembered once again why I LOVED her as a midwife, friend and maternal figure at birth. So....if you ever read my blog Cathy.....THANK YOU!! We LOVE you!

When Cathy got to our house, I told her I had tried to check myself but couldn't even find my cervix because it was too far back. She offered to check me and I was 5 cm. By this time the contractions were coming very regular and strong. My kids wanted eggs for breakfast so I decided I wanted to make them. Chris was laughing at me because I couldn't or wouldn't sit down (I think mostly because of the intense back labor sitting down felt VERY uncomfortable) While making the eggs, I would somewhat squat by the stove with each contraction and then stand up again to finish the eggs when it was over. After that, Chris and I went and sat outside in the sun. I wanted the sun beating down on me. I was kind of cold and I just had this strong feeling that I wanted to be outside as long as I could. It felt really good to me for some reason. We were going to go on a walk but as soon as I started walking I would have to hang on Chris or squat so we really didn't get anywhere.

By 12:30 pm, I could tell I was feeling a bit "pushy." I checked myself and was fully dilated. I could tell my cervix was still quite posterior which was probably the reason for the back pain. While checking I felt something I had NEVER felt before when checking a woman. It felt like a sweater over the top of the babies head. Normally, I would call that an anterior lip but it really wasn't a "lip" which is usually thicker and feels like a lip. This was just a thin piece of tissue holding up the babies head EVERY time I had a contraction. It covered about 1/2 of the babies head. So when I pushed, it was unproductive as the head was just putting pressure on that tissue and the baby wouldn't really move down until we could get that tissue moved out of the way.

At this point, I decided I wanted the tub. I got in and Cathy and I discussed that I should try holding that tissue back with each contraction. I did and talk about SEVERE back pain. This went on for several contractions until I was having a hard time doing it myself. I then proceeded to get out of the tub and get into a knees to chest position so we could take some of the pressure of the babies head off of the cervix. Let me tell you, this is the WORST position to have pushing contractions in, on top of having your cervix held back. You are working against gravity. NOT FUN!! I was a bit concerned because we could get it to stay back during a contraction but then when it was over, the tissue would just move right back over the babies head.

We held back the cervix and tried different positions for the next 1/2 an hour until I wanted to get back in the water and hold it myself again. Within a couple of contractions after getting in the water, I felt the tissue stay back after a contraction. I finally felt a bulging bag of waters coming out from the babies head. YEAH!! I could push and get the baby OUT!! HALLELUJAH! I broke my own waters and then felt as the baby came down. I don't remember pushing this hard with any of my other children. Well, maybe my first. I had heard others say that there is a big difference in the pain factor when pushing out a 8 lb. baby as compared to a 6 lb. baby. I DID NOT find that to be the case in my situation, I am sorry to say.

Cathy was holding my hands and pulling against me while I was squatting in the tub pushing her out. I am usually quit vocal at this point but I think this is the LOUDEST I have ever been. I have seen so many of my clients stay so quiet and I just don't know how they do it. Everyone is so different when it comes to giving birth. The interesting part, that Chris pointed out to me after, not one swear word came out of my mouth.

As I was pushing Cathy was asking me what I was feeling because I kept checking and feeling the babies head descending the whole time. The last time she asked I told her I felt burning. I told her "yes." She said "Oh good!!" I thought that was really cute! As soon as her head was out, my kids ran over to the tub to see it and were oooooing and ahhhhing over it. With the next contraction, I grabbed up Mabel and pulled her up to my chest. She did have a nuchal and chest cord. We quickly unwrapped it to then listen to her WONDERFUL scream. I have never cried after the birth of my children. I have been at many births where I have cried after someone else's birth but this was my first child where I sobbed just to see her BEAUTIFUL, healthy face. I was so GRATEFUL that all was well and we had been SO IMMENSELY BLESSED!!

As many of you already know, Chris was so anxious about us having a girl. A few days before the birth, he was in a severe depression because he had come to the conclusion it was going to be a boy. So it was HYSTERICALLY funny when within one second of birth, I heard Chris (who was sitting behind me) say, "Praise God, it's a girl." Now mind you, I have NEVER heard him say praise God before so that made the situation even FUNNIER!! He wasn't looking at how cute she was or if she was ok. The minute she was born this eyes only focused on the area that would show him whether or not he was having a daughter or a son. SO PRECIOUS!!

Chris was AMAZING during the whole process. He was supportive and LOVING rubbing my back and just being physically and emotionally supportive. My kids were all there to see their little sister born. They thought it was the COOLEST thing they had ever seen. The birth had been a bit intense toward the end trying to deal with the "lip" and all. Chris was so great to explain everything to them as it was happening so they were reassured that all was well. I could tell that since they could see Daddy wasn't stressed there was no need for them to be stressed either. They sat intently and quietly for an hour and an half waiting for her to be born. I was in complete AWE of my children and how grown up and mature they acted during the whole process. It made the experience so much more to have them there.

All in all, even with how hard it felt at the end, it was a WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL birth and the gift we received at the end was COMPLETELY worth it. She is the SWEETEST baby EVER!! We are all so HAPPY she is here and part of our family. As you can imagine, Chris is ECSTATIC to have a girl. He loves and caresses on her when he gets the chance. Hope you all like the pictures. Thanks for all the prayers that have been sent our way. With how stressful life has been with Johnny, our move etc., we couldn't top of the end with anything better than MAGNIFICENT Mabel.

Mabel Carroll Talley

Born: June 28th, 2008

Time: 1:48 pm

Weight: 6 lbs. 4 ozs.

Length: 18 1/2 in.

Abundant peace to all,

Rachel

by Rachel Talley

Mabel's Birth Story-Part 1 1/2

In the hopes of getting everyone even more excited to hear my birth story, I decided to create a bit more anticipation. I want to share a bit about my Full Moon Ceremony/Native American Blessingway first. I wish I had been on the ball enough to actually take a camera and take pictures but to no avail, once again, I came unprepared to do so. I do have some pictures of a few of the things that we did but none of who came. So sorry.

It was an AMAZING, UPLIFTING, SPIRITUAL night for me. I so needed to bond with other woman on the night of the full moon and just share and bask in our womanhood and the upcoming birth of my little girl.

I started out the night by showing a little clip discussing what conscious birth is, from the movie "Birth As We Know It." I did that in order to help others understand what I had planned for this pregnancy and birth. Most of the woman there already understood the concept and were so open to the new ideas and feelings that came along with it. After showing the clip, I broke into tears just about how grateful I was that all my friends were there and were open to letting the evening envelope them and truly connect with each other.

We then proceeded to walk upstairs and eat the DELICIOUS and NUTRITIOUS raw food we had made. We had made a BEAUTIFUL salad with a tahini/parsley/garlic dressing, since I had been craving tahini at the time. We did also provide food for the people who had a more expanded diet. We had hummus with WW tortillas and some DECADENT desserts my sister in law Yulia made. They were so ELEGANT! No one could even believe they were raw! While everyone was eating, I explained to them why I had requested they bring the charms to put on a necklace. I asked them to write intentions/prayers for my birth and then explain them to me while giving me the charm. OH MY GOODNESS!! This part of the ceremony was just a spiritual experience for me. I just couldn't believe how much thought and love everyone had put into their prayer and charm. Here is an example of one of the intentions I received:

"My intention for your birth is that you be keenly aware of the love our Heavenly Mother has for you. That you might perceive and recognize her in the substance of your dreams and the natural flowing of your thoughts and intuitions. By recognizing her within yourself, you will more easily trust your preferences, natural inclinations, and spiritual leanings. This is the Divine Feminine within you!

The charm I chose is because of it's earthly substance. Your spirit will tap into the divine through your Spirit self and by the substance of this charm you will apply that divine council in grounded and practical ways throughout the process of your birth and thereafter."

WOW!! Can you believe it? So AMAZING! Also, as everyone was eating and such I asked that each woman would be prayerful and draw on my belly cast what inspired them. Each woman was prayerful about it and my belly cast permeates love and peace.

After eating and such, a friend of mine played a melody she had written with her guitar. It spoke of the Divine Feminine in all of us and was so touching it brought most of us to tears. We all then went back downstairs to watch another clip of an actual birth where the woman was fully aware and present throughout the whole process. Again, each of us were brought to tears by the profound sense of our own existence.

Lastly, we ended the night with a pipe ceremony where my friend Shauna said a prayer for my birth and thereafter. Another friend sang again for us and we all spent the next hour relishing in each others thoughts and feelings about life and the awe of it all.

As everyone was leaving, I passed out tea candles with affirming, positive words for them to light when they got the call I was in labor. We created a calling circle where one of my friend's called everyone to let them know I was in labor and to light their candles. I just talked to a friend on the phone who had been out of town when she got the call. It was her birthday and she was feeling quite alone. She said it made her day to light her "ecstasy" candle and know that I was having my baby on her birthday. How FUN is that?

I feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to celebrate and have this ceremony with so many INSPIRING woman. I couldn't have asked for a better experience. It exceeded what I even expected. Thank you, my dear friends. I learned so much from you all that night and truly believe that my birth turned out to be such a GIVING, LOVING experience because of that night and your thoughts and prayers.

I will do my best to post my birth in the next few days. I have been dealing with a breast infection for the last couple of days. It was only REALLY bad yesterday but today seems to be MUCH better. I think it's the fever part that is so AWFUL!! I just hardly EVER get sick or have anything where I feel bad so I had forgotten what that feels like. But....once again, I was grateful for the experience. I got to look hard at myself and why I was wanted to create that kind of discomfort. Chris was AWESOME through the whole thing yesterday. He stayed home with me and helped me get through it. I sure LOVE and APPRECIATE him. I need to do it more!!

I am dealing with more emotional stuff right now. I wasn't quite ready for Mabel to come. She was a bit early, earlier than all my other kids and because life has been so crazy I think I wasn't emotionally prepared for her birth. It has been a bit of an adjustment. I have felt REALLY grateful that my sister Kim came out to stay with me. She has been SUCH a help. I don't know what I would without her right now. But....I am still trying to process all these feelings of going back to "babyland" and nursing and changing diapers and so on and so forth. I knew before she was born that I was having these feelings but, of course, they are much more apparent now that she is born. Does anyone have thoughts on this? Are there others out there who have also felt this way? I kind of feel like a first time Mom all over again. It's really WEIRD!! I would LOVE to hear others adjustments and how they dealt emotionally with such a HUGE change.

Thanks for listening all of you! Well, those who read my blog. LOL!! I will share more about my feelings and the birth very soon so check back!!

Abundant peace,

Rachel

by Rachel Talley

Mabel's Birth Story-Part 1 of 2

So.....we had a baby!!! Our sweet little Mabel was born in water on Saturday, June 28th at 1:48 pm. I am calling this post part 1 of 2 because this post will not tell my birth story. Instead I am posting some pictures of the last week or 2 of my pregnancy. For those who don't know, I have had 2 bowel surgeries so the long dark scar on my belly is from those. The last pictures where I am wearing the red shirt is actually me in labor.

I will come back and post the birth story within the next few days, along with how my Full Moon Ceremony and Native American Blessinway went. Both were AMAZING and am really excited to share the stories with everyone. In the next post, I will post pictures of me in labor and after. Thanks to all my friends and loved ones who have been sending up prayers and thoughts my way. It was IMMENSE help and I could feel so much love throughout the whole process of later pregnancy and birth.

by Rachel Talley