I’d like to start today by saying that in NO WAY do I mean offense or hurt to anyone by what I say below. Circumcision is a sensitive subject and myonly purpose in writing about it is my belief in its scarring and damaging effects on boys. I see circumcision as absolutely unnecessary and severely traumatic and hope those who read this will be open to my words without judgment or guile.
With the above being said, I’ve decided I’m gonna say it how I see it. Circumcisionis NOTHING LESS than sexual mutilation. Below is a link to a study done last year on the emotional effects of circumcision. I absolutely believe that every man who has been circumcised carries the same emotional energy of someonewho has been sexually abused.
NowI know there are probably 100’s of men who would disagree with my opinion. But I have now met enough men who are actually on the other end of this spectrum who wholeheartedly feel that their circumcision effected them above and beyond most any other traumatic event in their lives.
Since current clinical research is showing that newborns are truly feeling, sensational and understanding beings….how can we expect anything less than severe trauma to be experienced by the infant being circumcised? I have talked with many women who have expressed their own pain after watching their own son being circumcised. The screaming sounds that their child made during the circumcision process seems to be forever locked in the minds. In fact, I have family members who, without a full understanding of the effects of circumcision and because of the pain they saw in the son during the process, proceeded to circumcise their first son only to go on to leave their next sons intact.
Circumcision DOES have life long effects as shown in the study below. It FOREVER changes men and their perception of the world. Circumcision instils levels of anger and rage within that infant that is so unrelenting that, I believe, these same men go on to create wars and contentions within societies. We are one of the only mammals who will attack and actuallykill its own species.
I believe boys who are circumcised have a large volume of distrust of people around them. After being circumcised, these men struggle to trust the world and people around them. Circumcision imprints on the infant that the world is unsafe and even a fearful place. The results are a scarred psyches that feels it will be under attack at any moment.
Just because a man doesn’t remember his circumcision or doesn’t agree with anything I’m saying….doesn’t mean its not happening or that its not reality. Just like a women who might have been horribly raped doesn’t remember the experience, a man being circumcised can have equal amounts of trauma and not remember the inner pain he carries because of it.
Our systems are quite GIVING when it comes to how they deal with trauma. Nature does not want us to suffer so instead it gifts us with the ability to”check out” during a traumatic experience. We are able to disassociate ourselves from ourselves in order to survive the experience. At the moment, this disassociation helps the system to cope with the experience and come out on the other end able to still function in our world. But at what cost?
We do live in a world where the majority of us do not understand what a true, deep connection with those we love really feels like. We’ve lost the ability to even desire this connection and to how to even open ourselves up to it. As human beings, we all dearly LONG for connection and the ONLY reason we might not feel that this is our deepest desire is because we’ve decided to connect only means emotional, psychological or even physical pain.
I am writing this post with the hopes that we all can research circumcision BEFORE we deliver our boys. That we can all search deep inside ourselves to understand the effects this practice has on ourselves, our families and, most importantly, future generations. The effects of circumcision, I believe, have changed and will keep changing our planet as a whole if we don’tlook at the real reasons we’re performing such a horrendous ritual. As long as circumcision is considered a normal, routine practice, we will have to deal with the life long, devastating effects of anger, rage and sadness that then spill out onto all human kind.
I believe that if a man is willing to face the pain he carries, in regards to his circumcision, he can move past the pain and truly relearn to trust humanityagain. He is able to release the anger and rage and find within himself a sense of peace and serenity that he has been missing his wholelife.
Aman who strives to heal his circumcision wounding will find he desires forconnection more and understands what that looks like. He is willing andwanting to find his own sensitive side and help to create peace within himself and the world around him. The man who finds the strength to face thispain will then open himself up to helping other men find answers for their healing. As each man helps to heal himself, these steps would then go onto change the whole of human kind.
I believe wars would end. Men would find ways and means of resolving conflicts tranquilly. They would strive to let themselves feel the fullrange of emotions inside of them instead of believing in a false sense safety through emotional suppression. How we treat each other, how we talk toeach other, how we care for each other…..would ALL find a new ground forhealing and wholeness. We would see the new world in a new light where peace, love and connection were imbedded in all of us and we felt free and safe to thoroughly share ourselves with our earthly brothers and sisters.
As mother, its VITALLY important that we take the opportunity to research and integrate within ourselves the life long ramifications of circumcision. We are the only mammalian species who hands their young over to others to behurt and defiled. Any other mammal would rip your eyes out if you handled, treated and physically scarred their infants like we do ours. Circumcision is NOT the only traumatic event that takes place at birth but it is DEFINITELY one with the biggest physical, psychological and emotional negative effects.
I have TONS more I could say on circumcision but I will stop here. I also have several videos I could post but I will save the rest for anothertime.
Below is a video from my FAVORITE birth movie…”Birth As We KnowIt.” Here Elena is discussing the harsh effects ofcircumcision. If you find that you have a hard time watching this video, I would hope you would ask yourself why. I have grown men who will walkout of my childbirth classes when I show a video of circumcision. Why? I believe its because it stimulates their own circumcision trauma so fully that it is still to painful to let themselves be present in that pain….even though it is no longer happening to them.
Please watch in the video how they handle and touch the penis. You women out there….imagine if someone handled and cut our clitoris like this. Its abhorrent to think of someone cutting off our clitoris but that practice is still happening in our world today. There is NO difference between circumcision and clitoris removal.
Also, listen closely to the infant’s cries. I have NEVER heard one of my children cryin this manner. Let yourself really FEEL how watching this video makesyou feel. You’ll find its quite hard to stay present while even watching this video.
I hope you will check back soon. I will post more videos and discuss more aboutcircumcision.
In Peace,
Rachel
Researchers find circumcised men have higher alexithymia scores than intact men. Alexithymia is the inability to process emotions.
The International Journal of Men’s Health has published the first study of its kind to look at the link between the early trauma of circumcision and the personality trait disorder alexithymia. The study, by Dan Bollinger and Robert S. Van Howe, M.D., M.S., FAAP, found that circumcised men are 60% more likely to suffer from alexithymia, the inability to process emotions.
People suffering from alexithymia have difficulty identifying and expressing their emotions. This translates into not being able to empathize with others. Sufferers of severe alexithymia are so removed from their feelings that they view themselves as being robots. If acquired at an early age, such as from infant circumcision, it might limit access to language and impede the socialization process that begins early in life. Moderate to high alexithymia can interfere with personal relationships and hinder psychotherapy. Impulsive behavior is a key symptom of alexithymia, and impulsivity is a precursor to violence.
The idea for the investigation came when the authors noticed that American men (for whom circumcision is likely) had higher alexithymia scores than European men (for whom circumcision is unlikely), and that European men had about the same scores as European and American women.
The study surveyed 300 circumcised and intact men using the standardized Toronto Twenty-Item Alexithymia Scale checklist. Circumcised men had higher scores across the board and a greater proportion of circumcised men had higher scores than intact men.
A common reason fathers give for deciding to circumcise their son is so they will “look alike,” but these authors speculate that perhaps a subconscious motivation is so that they will “feel alike,” in other words as equally distant and emotionally unavailable as themselves. It was beyond this study’s design to test for this, and yet the comments received from circumcised participants speak to a vast psychic wounding, which, if unresolved, might lead to an unconscious desire to repeat the trauma upon others.
The authors recommend that more research be conducted on this topic, but in the meantime, parents considering circumcising their infant son should be informed that circumcision might put their son at risk for alexithymia, including difficulty identifying and expressing his feelings, and for impulsive behavior. Psychologists counseling alexithymic patients should investigate the patient’s childhood and neonatal history for possible traumatic events, including circumcision.
If this pattern of men suffering from circumcision-related trauma holds true for the general populace, this would constitute a significant mental health problem and, considering that three-fourths of the U.S. male population is circumcised, a public health problem, too.
Alexithymia is from ancient Greek meaning, “having no words for feelings.” It was coined by psychotherapist Peter Sifneos in 1973 to describe a state of deficiency in understanding, processing, or describing emotions. Alexithymia tends to be persistent and chronic; it doesn’t diminish with time. This is unlike other trauma-based reactions, like post-traumatic stress disorder, which typically dissipate soon after the trauma.
Source: Alexithymia and Circumcision Trauma: A Preliminary Investigation
I could not watch this whole thing. I just wanted to scoop that baby up the whole time. I am so relieved that this is something I looked well into before having any of my boys, and that both my husband and I agreed they should be spared something so traumatic and unnecessary. There’s nothing even close to that I’d ever let anyone do to my baby girl, so why is it ok for an equally defenseless and feeling baby boy?
Although I am not a fan of circumcision, there could be lots of other factors that lead to lack of emotionality in men. You and I personally know 2 men who are not circumcised but that are both emotionally stunted or are unable to express emotion. I am just saying you can’t pin it all of one factor. Our parents probably screw us up more than circumcision 🙂
Kim…I’m not saying that this is the only factor, for sure. Only stating that it could maybe be one of the factors for emotional unavailability within men.
This blog was so thought provoking. I am a mother to 4 daughters and never once have had to contemplate the circumcision issue. This has given me a new perspective and also an opportunity to get to know his feelings on this issue. Thanks!
I really admire and respect you for writing this and being so earnest but as a circumcised man I disagree with one thing. When you say “I believe that if a man is willing to face the pain he carries, in regards to his circumcision, he can move past the pain and truly relearn to trust humanity again.” I disagree with the notion that the distrust a circumcised man feels for others and society is necessarily an irrational thing. Rather I think that it’s actually a perfectly rational reaction. I would not want to experience a ‘deep connection’ as I know that that leaves a man vulnerable and open to be exploited. I’d rather find happiness on my own.